Biography

I was, from a few days after birth until I was nearly three years old, educated and instructed in every proper discipline at my adoptive mother's orders, and I spent my time just as every child does, that is, in drinking, eating, and sleeping; in eating, sleeping, and drinking; in sleeping, drinking, and eating. I was always wallowing in the mud, smudging my nose, dirtying my face, running my shoes over at the heels, catching flies with my mouth, and I liked to chase the butterflies over which my mother had dominion. I piddled on my shoes, sh*t in my shirt, blew my nose on my sleeves, dropped snot in my soup, waddled around everywhere, drank from my slipper, and usually rubbed my belly with a basket. My teeth I sharpened with a wooden shoe, my hands I washed with soup, I combed myself with a cup, sat between two chairs with my rump on the ground, covered myself with a wet sack, drank while eating my soup, ate my cake without bread, bit while laughing, laughed while biting, often spat on my plate, farted from fatness, piddled at the sun, hid in the water to get out of the rain, struck while the iron was cold, daydreamed, was as sweet as sugar, flayed the fox, said the monkey's paternoster, returned to my sheep, turned the sows out to hay, thrashed the servant to teach the master a lesson, put the cart before the horse, scratched myself where it did not itch, wormed secrets out of everyone, embraced too much and grasped little, ate my white bread first, put horseshoes on locusts, tickled myself to make myself laugh, was always rushing in the kitchen, offered sheaves of straw to the gods, had the Magnificat sang at Matins and found it quite appropriate, ate cabbage and sh*tted leeks, was able to recognize a fly in my milk, filled my days doing nothing, raked paper, smeared parchment, took to my heels, drank bottoms up, counted without my host, beat around the bush without getting the bird, thought that clouds were brass nickels and that kidneys were lanterns, doubled my money on nothing, played the *ss in order to bray, made a hammer with my fists, captured cranes on the first try, wanted chain mail made link by link, always looked a gift horse in the mouth, jumped from c*ck to bull, robbed Peter to pay Paul, made a ditch out of dirt, kept the wolf from the door, hoped to catch larks if the skies fell, made a virtue of necessity, made soup of bread, cared as little for the shorn as for the shaven, and flayed the fox every morning. The other neighborhood dogs ate out of my dish; I in turn ate with them. I bit their ears, they scratched my nose; I blew up their bungholes, they licked my chops.

(OK, that's from Rabelais's "Gargantua and Pantagruel")

Music rss

Title Genre Released Plays
Let's Make the Water Turn Black (Logic Vocoder demo) Other Mar 10, 2009 914
Doctor Chan Other Mar 8, 2009 504
The Idiot B****** Son Other Mar 4, 2009 387
Killer Joe Collab Pop Mar 4, 2009 289
Logic: Using the Built-In Vocoder Music Videos Feb 27, 2009 788
Logic: What Does "Search Zero Crossings" Mean? Music Videos Feb 25, 2009 583
The iComps International Agnostic Monotone Choir Other Feb 24, 2009 584
Miniature in D Major Classical Feb 22, 2009 209
Recorder Trio in A Minor Classical Feb 19, 2009 265
The Angel Raphael in Hell, Fighting Off Demons Collab Inspirational Feb 17, 2009 755
All Along the Watchtower Rock Feb 17, 2009 327
4' 33" Music Videos Feb 17, 2009 343
OPEN COLLAB: Pocketful of Glass Collab Other Feb 15, 2009 473
All That There Is Other Feb 14, 2009 277
Seven Roars Other Feb 14, 2009 205
Pretty Woman Rock Feb 13, 2009 214
Life Itself Other Feb 13, 2009 223
No Escape Rock Feb 12, 2009 232
New Strings Rock Feb 12, 2009 263
The Song of Roland Other Feb 12, 2009 221
The Juniper Tree Classical Feb 12, 2009 324
The Outer Circle Other Feb 11, 2009 243
Helado Other Feb 11, 2009 208
What's Good? Rock Feb 11, 2009 198
American Bittern Other Feb 11, 2009 571
Sound Light Other Feb 11, 2009 223
Jazzy Cat Rock Feb 11, 2009 269
Don't Pass Me By Rock Feb 11, 2009 393
Tomorrow Never Knows Rock Feb 10, 2009 334
Eno and I Music Videos Feb 10, 2009 404
Hey Jude Rock Feb 10, 2009 436
Wrecktified Rock Feb 10, 2009 209
Nature, the Gentlest Mother Classical Feb 10, 2009 321
Spiro Rock Feb 10, 2009 365

Collaborations

Title Genre Released Plays
Mysteries of Love w/Mark Hayes Other Mar 3, 2009 741
While My Guitar Gently Weeps w/Mark Hayes Other Feb 21, 2009 1061
Variations For Wind Quartet- Revoiced Classical Feb 20, 2009 228
The Outer Circle 1.0b Other Feb 15, 2009 182
The Outer Circle 2.0 remix Other Feb 14, 2009 305
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